爱你有那么难吗？
is loving you really so difficult?
友情不能长久吗？
我好像没有过一个很长很长的友情。。
有时，友情对我来说只是一个小小的事。。
但在别的时候他就像是个很重要的事。。
can't friendships last?
i don't seem to have a friendship that has lasted for a really long time.
sometimes i feel that friendships are just a small matter..
but at other times, it seems SO important..
有时，我想，别人不喜欢我。
但在别时侯， 我想他们不是不喜欢我，是我想太多了.
sometimes, i think, that no one likes me.
but at another, i don't feel that they don't like me, and think that i'm thinking too much.
我想有个很很很可以长久，一个我可以相信，一个我可以和他说我所有的事，一个很高兴的友情。。
我知道你们会说你可以作那些事。但是，问题是我。我找不到那感觉。
i want to have a friendship that will last very very very long, a friendship that i can trust, a friendship i can tell her/him everything, a really happy friendship..
i know that you guys will say you can do those. but, i'm the problem. i can't find the feeling / enough trust..
对不起我不是那么相信你们。我不知道这么说。。 就。。。。
咳， 希望你们会了解。。
sorry that i don't really trust you guys, i don't know how to say.. it's just....
hais, i just hope that you guys will understand..
i'm just saying what my heart is telling me..
i said it with a heavy heart but also not reacting much.
i have never really trusted one enough to tell her / him everything.. i'm not good with trusting and also i'm not really trustable (i feel) because of some reasons..
actually, what brought me to this topic is my clique..
i don't know to put it as my past clique or my clique now.
do we seem as normal as we were last time?
well, it's not.. it's breaking..
SO many things tells me so.
do you guys realise?
i shall not say who is in the wrong because i have no rights to.
but i guess / hope everyone has put in their effort..
a day is reaching but things are so bad, we are unable to come up with something..
this may be a hint to you.. but i guess / hope it's ok..
because our clique is falling apart.. breaking as the days go by..
we were no longer what we were before..
we seems to be in different groups.
i don't know what to do to help. i tried.. i think i tried.
but it seems like it as failed.. but i guess i should just keep trying although the answer seems to be in my face..
at least we still talk.. right?..
my heart is getting heavier as i continue saying..
i'm glad that at leat i still ahve other friends. friends i feel i can share somethings with but not every as i've said the reason..
at least God gave me more than few friends. at least i know there are still people who care..
